The magic was all in the finishing touches.
I know this as much as
I try to deny.
Magnolia apartment, bare walls, a cheap kettle.
But I now know why.
I’ll buy some flowers and a photo frame,
Isn’t it all the same?
What does it matter?
Little nick-knacks to make a place feel more like home.
Pretend I’m not alone,
I’ll soon feel better.
But I’m not yet ready to go outside.
I just want to hide…
Get some perspective.
My new surroundings are too much like a hotel.
They make me feel unwell,
Which holds me captive.
I could’ve stayed, not sought refuge and aid,
If I had just obeyed,
Taken his beatings.
But now I’m here in this secured apartment block.
They’ve told me I should talk,
Go to some meetings.
Maybe flowers, pictures –They’ll bring back some magic
To this life, so tragic,
Get me back on track.
I’ll leave this place, go to meetings; be a new me.
Then everyone will see
There’s no going back.
This is so very carefully crafted -- love the rhyme scheme and the way it's used to ratchet up the tension!
ReplyDeleteIt really was carefully crafted. With such a lot going on behind the words.
ReplyDeleteI love the idea of hiding to "get some perspective." And, oh, the different ways we hide.
ReplyDeleteThis is terrific. You've captured an entire life in few words. And I love the hope at the end. There's no going back as there so often is in those cases. Nice work!
ReplyDeleteApologies to JackB, I accidentally deleted his comment:
ReplyDeleteJack: I agree with Stephanie, you did capture a life with just a few words.
I can't believe how much you told between the written lines. I think the previous description of carefully crafted is perfect.
ReplyDeleteGreat job!
This is an amazing poem! I'm glad she escaped and hope she finds happiness.
ReplyDeletethis is awesome. brilliantly told. awesome pace. you got skills.
ReplyDeleteFantastic piece Georgina! Love the rhythm as well as the theme. My favourite line is this one: "Magnolia apartment, bare walls, a cheap kettle. All testing my mettle" - beautiful!
ReplyDeleteGenius, I managed to delete another comment instead of publishing (Not going to do it via mobile ANYMORE! Sorry Mod Mom.
ReplyDeletemod mom beyond indiedom: So well done. Each line conveying so much and the descriptions heightened the feeling of loneliness, desperation, empowerment and strength. So much said so sparingly.
Lovely rhythm. Really conveys her anxiety and nerves. Good job.
ReplyDelete